Curling Rocks!

The 2010 Winter Games are over, but just like four years ago in Torino, the nation was captivated by the little known game of curling. It's funny how the Olympics do that; make sports like curling and speed-skating relevant, even if for only 16 days. I don't get it, but I like it. I like it a lot. I can't help but get into rooting for USA! I was jumping off the couch with excitement during the one victory I witnessed for USA men's curling. Jumping up and down and curling aren't typically words that go together, but that’s what I do; I like to mix it up a bit. Only when you try something out of the ordinary, can you hope for extraordinary things to come about, and that my friends, is when dreams come true.

Despite all of my efforts mixing it up to make our curling dreams come true (for the record, I’m assuming you all had great aspirations for USA curling in these Olympics), the team proceeded to choke in every imaginable sense of the word. It was so bad, after starting 0-4 the team benched their Skip for a match. Benched in curling, talk about a donkey punch in the stones. The guy had 4 or 5 last shots to win matches in those first four games. How many do you think he made? The performance was even bad enough to coin a new term based on the Skip’s name, John Shuster. Now if you really screw something up, you Shustered it. Sample sentence: I can’t believe Lindsey Jacobellis lost a gold medal while show-boating in the Torino sno-cross. She really Shustered the shit outta that one! Feel free to comment with one of your best Shuster moments. One time I tried to thaw out the plastic milk jug by putting it on the stove. I really Shustered that one.

Get off your knees Shuster, you're blowin' the game!

You may wonder why I take any kind of interest in curling. Let me enlighten you. Aside from the fact that it is awesome, curling is very big in my hometown. You could say it is the curling hotbed of America. Five total players on the 2006 USA men's and women's curling team in Torino are from my hometown. Curling was offered as a gym class in high school. The Skip of the '06 games, Pete Fenson (aka MVPete) is the owner of the best pizza place in America, with one of its two locations in my hometown. We love us some curling up in the great white North and it shows. Congrats on your bronze medal, Pete and Joe. Too bad John Shustered the team and broke off on his own.

Joe Polo, MVPete, Jamie and Cassie Johnson, Scott Baird, and The Godfather of Curling: Jim 'V' Variano

It sure was a great finale to see USA vs. USA Jr. slug it out in one of the best hockey games ever played. I really would have liked to see a different outcome, but the real winners here were the fans. I just wanted to see a good game, win or lose. As Rasheed Wallace said, 'both teams played hard.' That's a bold faced lie, who am I kidding? I wish we would have pounded those poutine eating foreigners (sorry GLVJ)! I blame the loss on my boy Addy, and anyone else who may have made a comment about Sidney Crosby being a ghost on the ice during the game. I certainly thought about it, but I didn’t say it out loud. Hello! Talk about your all time jinxes. If you made a comment about Crosby not being a factor during the game, you really Shustered that one. Why do you hate America?

I still believe in miracles Al, and you still give me the chills when you ask me, everytime.