This is the 71st posting of the news articles from the Beer and Pretzel Hockey League written by the beat writer that covers the league. He calls himself Dickie Dunn - his true identity is unknown.
Greetings hockey fans and welcome to another good old fashioned family article of Hockey News BPHL: Special Edition Vol: 3.19. Silver dropped a tight game Monday night, surrendering to Black by a final of 7 - 11. Silver had even less skaters then the previous game and found it difficult to keep up with the iron lungs of the Black veterans. The ice was tilted one way with 16 of the goals being scored in one end. Silver has at least 3 healthy scratches tonight - maybe more.
The PLARSHMT & OBMASLF were yet again not awarded. Coop won his own trophy but forgot to take it home (Shiny Alex Cooper Fake Gold Faceoff Chain) - winning a fair amount of draws. The Ag Player Silver Spotlight again features a submission from a former player. Enjoy the following guest editor submission and heed the advice with caution.
Greetings Degeneration X! Well we’re having a rough start to this segment at just 20% (Dickie will face check that number) but bowl season is upon us and so is that time of the year NFL teams stop caring or start trying. Let’s dive right into it and start things off with The BYU Mighty Mormon Man Boys (pretty sure the average age of their players is 24) playing the UCF Retirees??? UCF is +6.5 and I think they’re gonna need a lot more help then that. Zach Wilson has the arm, players around him and probably a huge dick too. Look for him to put on a clinic. Feel free to increase your odds on this pick and tease it up to 13 cause those non-smoking, decaf-drinking Mormons have a lot of pent up testosterone and aggression that they are gonna unleash all over the faces of those bums from Florida. BYU covers before the half and never looks back.
HO HO HO it’s Christmas Day with Marshall a 3 point favorite against the Buffalo Bulls. Everything points to Buffalo in this one. They’re bigger, faster, stronger, and Marshall sucks. Buffalo by a million!
Boxing Day blowout alert! Louisiana Ragin' Cajuns are giving up 13 to the Acme Roadrunners from San Antonio. UTSA is going to have to pull out all of the stops in this one, it’s the last game of their year. The Co-Sun Belt Champs Cajuns are hungry for another victory and you’d better give them some Tony Chachere creole injectable butter because they’ve been on a roll! Easy cover here. Bonus prop bet alert for all you guys looking to make a little more coin, if you can find a book that has any lines on the number of times the broadcast team makes reference to Pee Wee Herman looking for his bike in the basement of the Alamo. Should payoff bug! -Ned Braden
Don't forget to check out the archives of all your favorite Hockey News! articles that really capture the spirit of the thing over at the main blog site www.ddunnwrotethis.blogspot.com. Keep in mind that the perfect accessory for the man in your life, is a season ticket to Silver team's games.
Stars of the Game
2) DK Tuber
Remember, Dickie Dunn wrote this, so it's gotta be true
Since 2/14/19:
Silver ATS 45-24-1
Silver Money Line (as favorite) 20-10-0
Silver Money Line (as underdog) 11-29-0
Silver Games O/U 33-36-1
Under 16.5 (-110)
Black -99,750
Silver -0.5 (+105)
Under 10.5 (-110)
Red +105
No comments:
Post a Comment