Friday, March 12, 2021

Hockey News! Special Edition Vol: 3.35

This is the 87th posting of the news articles from the Beer and Pretzel Hockey League written by the beat writer that covers the league.  He calls himself Dickie Dunn - his true identity is unknown.

Greetings hockey fans and welcome to a special rivalry-edition article of Hockey News BPHL: Special Edition Vol: 3.35.  Silver and Gold met yet again for PRECIOUS METALS GAME 8 and let me tell you, it was a DOOZY.  Silver's struggles against their bitter rival this season have been well documented in Hockey News! articles, so it was to no surprise that Silver fell behind quickly 0 - 5.  The game pace did not slow at this point, nor did either team throw in the towel with each team adding a goal or two here and there, running the score up to 4 - 9 by the third period.

The odds stood long for Silver at this point, who had ever heard of a 5 goal, third period comeback against a Billy Wilson-less Gold?  This was the type of comeback that only a Gold roster from 8 years ago or the current Black roster could muster.  Even so, those are stories of legend and rumor, something you might hear in the Moylan Ice-Plex parking lot on a warm, moonlit Thursday night.  Rumor has it that Silver once surrendered a 9 - 1 lead, losing 10 - 11 to Gold.  You will not find that in the archives though, it only exists in the memories of the players.

Silver team was ready to rewrite the history books on this Monday night at the War Memorial.  After Silver got a goal or two back, Gold had not scored and frustrations built on the ice for one Rayleighn Alpert.  After a few cheap shots to many of the Silver players from the Gold player menace, Rayleighn, Zach Voss had had enough and the tilt was on.  A few seconds later, Voss had landed several haymakers and Alpert lay on the ice in disbelief and pain, leaking from his mouth and nose.  Both were ejected from the game and suspended from play on Thursday.

Silver, clearly jacked up from the Voss donnybrook, started getting pucks to the net and scoring at will.  Suddenly, the deficit was only a single goal.  The meltdown was purely golden and Silver smelled blood in the water (i.e., Alpert's blood from getting bitch-slapped in the melted ice).   Mullendore calmly walked into the slot and fired the equalizer past Slattery with just under two minutes remaining in regulation.  Both teams went into a defensive shell to finish the game, not wanting to give up the game winner.

The stage was set for the shootout, Silver on the cusp of a comeback for the ages and Gold on the brink of humiliating defeat that would likely send them into a spiral of shame from which it will take years to recover.  Blue pants super-try hard was up for Gold and missed the net!  Harris followed for Silver and easily slipped it underneath the blocker of Slattery.  Satan Needler then shot for Gold and barely found the back of the net, knotting the shootout at one apiece.  Silver and Gold's next shooters both were stopped, leaving one final shooter for Silver.  Parrone took the puck at center ice and casually cruised towards the crease.  There was a quiet and clear confidence about him, the entire arena could feel it emanating from his being.  After reaching the slot, Parrone gave a slight shake and fired the puck towards Slattery's five-hole.  The back of the net made a soft "thud," confirming for the Silver bench what they had been anticipating was now a reality, the game winning goal had been scored.

Post-game celebrations began in the dressing room with barley waters flowing from the heavens and a carnival-like atmosphere.  The jubilation even spilled out to the parking lot where the game winning goalie provided more refreshments, including chips, pretzels, peanut butter patties, and thin mints!  It certainly was a terrific end to a fairy-tale game.

PRESTIGIOUS LA ROSS SILVER HELMET MEMORIAL TROPHY*
Photo credit L.B. Jeffries
Zach Voss - 1 Gordie Howe Hattrick+, 1 game misconduct, 1 wink
*not pictured

The PLARSHMT & OBMASLF (and Faceoff Chain) were awarded to Zach Voss via a face-time call in the dressing room.  

Don't forget to check out the archives of all your favorite Hockey News! articles that really capture the spirit of the thing over at the main blog site www.ddunnwrotethis.blogspot.com.  Keep in mind that the perfect accessory for the man in your life, is a season ticket to Silver team's games.

Stars of the Game

1)  Zach Voss
2)  Rob Barton (goal saving backcheck early in the game - made all the difference)
3a)  Matt Blaszkiewicz (lobbied hard during postgame, mentioning 2 G)
3b) Griffith Watson - for buying the impromptu 30 rack (and chips) at the gas station for parking lot enjoyment and stopping 2 of 3 in the extra session

Pit Viper Vosser

Silver is back in action Monday, 15 March at RALSTON Arena at 9:30 PM.  Silver and Teal open up the first of a home and home.  Silver has an impressive 5-0-0 record for the season against the not-quite-blue or purple team.  Will the Silver success continue?  Coming off a big high, beating their rival and a week off to dream about it, this looks like a big time trap game for Silver.  Teal has to be extra hungry, looking for their first win of 2021.  There is only one way to find out!  This week the War Memorial is celebrating the 1-year anniversary of "two weeks to flatten the curve!"  Free vaccines for all fans that bring a $28 donation (ticket purchase also required).  Come on down to the Ralston Arena, bring the kids!  We've got entertainment for the whole family.

Remember, Dickie Dunn wrote this, so it's gotta be true

Gambling Corner
Since 2/14/19:
Silver ATS 54-32-1
Silver Money Line (as favorite) 27-10-0
Silver Money Line (as underdog) 13-37-0
Silver Games O/U 43-43-1
Silver Wins Final 17 Reg. Season Games (2020-21) O/U 7.5 - Record 4-3-0

PRECIOUS METALS GAME 8 Recap
Silver +3.5 (-150)
Gold -3.5 (+120)

Over 13.5 (-110)
Under 13.5 (-110)

Silver +150
Gold -1,995

Silver Wins in shootout, overcoming 5-goal deficit including shutout in 3rd period +100,000

Silver/Teal Odds
Silver -1.5 (+120)
Teal +1.5 (-130)

Over 13.5 (-110)
Under 13.5 (-110)

Silver -145
Teal +135

Silver Key Players/Trends/Injuries: Harris (always #1 key), Voss (Gordie Howe Hattrick+ last game).  5-0-0 ATS last 5.  Bednarz (DTD with snakebite).

Teal Key Players/Trends/Injuries:  Alexander (aka Mario) has returned to lineup after missing 75% of season, Honaker (extremely high motor).  0-5-0 against Silver this season and 0-15-0 last 15.

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