#VoteDozier

Ode to Taco Bell

So last night I'm pulling through the Taco Bell drive-thru and I am feeling super psyched to destroy two of the best menu items that have ever been available at the fine franchise.  Of course, I'm referring to the newly re-instated Beefy Crunch Burrito and the Cheesy Gordita Crunch (it's crun-chew-eesy).  Just pretend that the guy in this video is me.  It pretty much sums up how I feel.

It's about 10:30 on a Thursday night and this particular drive through seems a tad bit backed up.  I pull up behind a big dually pick-up that is at the ordering intercom.  After the order is completed, the truck begins to pull forward and the back left tires get up on the curb, then they start scraping a plastic protective bumper post in the grass. I think to myself "This guy has never driven a big truck before.....or he's half in the bag."  I was erroneous on both counts. This drive-thru is a tad tight around the corner to the pick-up window.  It has a retaining wall that butts up against the side of a hill, so there is definitely potential to scrape the wall if you turn too wide, or have a nice curb check if you turn to tight.  This truck was already hugging the wrong side of the curb and had no chance at its current position to make the turn with out jumping the curb and running over the NEXT plastic protective bumper (which I do believe has an actual concrete or metal pole inside the thin candy shell, I'm surprised you didn't know that).

The next thing I know, both tires have hopped the curb and now the truck is trying to back up, but the mirror is hitting the bumper on the way back.  I've already ordered and there is another car pulled up behind me.  I am thinking that my chances of getting my order from the window have gone to zero and the chances of my car getting backed in to have gone to 99%.  Then some kid (presumably her son from a car back?) walks up to the truck and starts talking to the driver.  Then the driver almost gets out of the car and by golly it's a nice middle-aged lady..... Now I understand what's happening here.  After some discussion, the kid begins directing her as she backs and then as she goes around the turn.  It was fairly successful, I began taking a video of it just in case something exciting happened.

The kid then stops to talk to me and explained that she asked him to drive the truck through AND that he did not know that woman at all.  He also said she looked "high as fuck."  It was pretty entertaining, even though the ordeal took an extra 15 minutes.  I thought it was a neat little story to share, considering I've never seen anything like it.  I once tried to back all the way out of a Taco Bell drive-thru because it was taking too long and we had 'borrowed' my friends truck over lunch and were running out of time.  I subsequently smashed the front quarter panel in to a light pole as I backed up rather hastily.... To be fair, I was only 16 and this story isn't about MY driving, so let's just get back to the real story.

I get my bag of food and head home.  As I pull out my first item, thinking it must be the gordita crunch since it doesn't feel like a burrito, I come to find out it isn't a gordita OR a burrito.  It's a freaking Chalupa Supreme!  Now I frantically dig through the rest of the bag to see what else I had.  One more Chalupa Supreme and a hard shell taco.  I carefully reviewed my receipt, it clearly has MY order on it.  I also remember being specifically asked if the items on the order screen were correct, to which I replied a resounding "YES!"  My order was two Beefy Crunch burritos and one Cheesy Gordita Crunch.  As I scratched my head and made this face, I didn't become mad, angry, irate, furious, or pissed off.  Not because I am a forgiving person and I can't bring myself to get angry at Taco Bell employees for their incompetence.  (Sidebar: I used to hate lettuce on any of my taco bell food and would basically throw a shit fit and pout if there was lettuce on it when I specifically always say NO GODDAMN LETTUCE, but then I turned 29 and grew up so it's all good now)  It was because the food I got looked pretty freaking good!  I never order Chalupas because they are more expensive, I think? (can't really be sure because I never order them!)  As for the other item, who am I to scoff at a crispy hard shell taco?

I told one of my favorite Taco Bell eating partners about my experience and how I wasn't really mad.  Yes, I consider one of my friends a Taco Bell eating partner, it's not weird.  We just happen to eat Taco Bell almost every night we've ever hung out and share a passion for food.  He restated my situation with the silver lining that had just come to fruition upon eating my meal, "The good thing is it's tough to be too disappointed, no matter what you pull from a tbell bag."  Which led me to having an even greater appreciation of Taco Bell.  It's not just a fast (usually), inexpensive place to enjoy fritos mashed up with cheesy beefy goodness.  No, Taco Bell is so much more than that.  It's a place where friendships are formed, memories are made (3rd and 4th paragraphs), and taste buds are delighted.  This night at the drive-thru (sounds like a bad Ben Stiller movie title) brought me to realize one more thing that makes TBell a pretty unique place, because it's not just anywhere you can get the COMPLETE wrong order and still have a very delicious and satisfying meal.  Here's to you TBell.  Live más!

SUCH A GOOD DEAL!

Been in love since it hit the menu. Don't ever change!

Really?

Unless this book is making fun of the world and it's technology dependence, the world must be coming to an end.  I have no idea if it is, but I really really, really, really, hope Ann Droyd (get it?) is not the Angel of Death just waiting to end it all.

God save us?

Bringing Back Comments

I was reading Jum Hammonds' blog and realized that he needs some help.  For some time now the ability to comment on The Slice posts have been disabled due to spammers.  I've had the same problem (although probably on a much smaller scale) and I just delete the email alerts I receive throughout the day.  Sure turning the alerts off, or disabling comments would stop the annoying spammers from bothering me, but A) let's be honest....I haven't written a post since March 2011, which makes me a bit on the lazy side, 2) I like that someone still visits this page, and D) getting emails boosts my fragile self esteem.

Anyway, you know the word verification things you sometimes have to type in when doing important transactions on the interwebs? Things like, buying tickets on StubHub, Ticketmaster, TwinsBaseball.com and other things like that?  The stupid and annoying and usually difficult to read non-sensical combination of letters/numbers such as Plhsita3 or snOkfe1.  You do know what I'm talking about? Well, I remembered that putting the word verification on the comment page was an option, probably for the very reason of keeping the foreign language spamming out of our blog commenting world.  For testing purposes, I have turned on the word verification for commenting on this post.  So I guess that is it, try and make a comment now you dirty spammers!  Even though the word verification thing is a nuisance, I think it's a fair price to pay to get the comment board rolling again for The Slice.  I haven't heard from Random Ted in a while.

I will probably still miss my email alerts....

Since this is a pretty lame excuse for a post, here are a few things I've been doing to occupy my time.

I saw John Smoltz.  PHX airport on a Sunday night. Watching SNB while his wife played with her phone.

I saw A baseball stadium. #14

I saw another baseball stadium. #15

We made a trip to the Tournament of Roses.  It was a great trip overall that started with New Year's in Vegas, the Rose Parade, and a fantastic student athelete football match between the Ducks and Badgers minus the Rose Parade.  Not sure how I could ever miss another Rose Bowl.  It's a tradition that I will make a big effort to continue for years to come.  (Unless flights don't come down from $800 from now until Jan. 1.)

Addy D is ready for some football.

Even the tickets are beautiful.

View from our actual seats. Not bad.

Our upgraded seats. Even better.

Pai Gow and the Earl of Sandwich = Epic Nights

Life's been good to me so far. I feel like I've been blessed in my time here on Earth. I've been through some good, some bad, and some ugly. This last weekend (and by last weekend, I mean some weekend in December) was a combination of all of those, yet the end result was nothing but another grand adventure. Going to Vegas usually has that effect on a weekend. As fantastic of a time it was, there was a point in the early going where it was on the verge of being a disaster (I guess we probably could have made the most of it and made it still really awesome, but since it didn't turn down that path, I'll just say it would have been close to the end of my blessed life as I knew it. You know, for dramatic effect). Shortly after I woke up after the first night of the weekend, I came so close to the edge of the cliff, I was actually falling off, until a mighty hand reached out and snatched me from what was to be certain death. This is the story.

Some time last year my boy Dave announced that he and Timmy Reynolds would be playing a small tour in December. That tour included two shows in The Vegas. Since Addy and I have never seen this dynamic duo and since we had pretty much seen every other concert that DMB had played on the summer tour, we decided that it would be pretty stupid not to go. Let's just get it out of the way and call me a super fanatic weirdo that would follow Dave anywhere. You can make fun of me all you want. I don't care, not even a little bit.

Some Thursday in December I arrived and quickly pulled up to the Planet Hollywood (PH) sports book to take in the Colts/Titans game while I waited with great anticipation for my friend Addy to arrive. Upon his arrival we polished off our typical weekend starter shots of Jameson and prepared for a wild ride.

This marks my fourth trip to Sin City and since I'm not a huge table game gambler, I've sort of developed my Vegas formula. I dabble in a bit of blackjack and craps, but I hate losing money. If I'm down quickly, I get pissed and walk away. There is a hidden gem of a game that I have grown deeply fond of. The name of this post gives light to that game. Pai Gow.

I don't think many people know how to play, which is a shame because if you want to gamble and drink for free without much risk of losing money, this is the game for you. I feel it is my duty to explain and share it with the world, and by the world I mean the three people that read this. It's a simple game really, based on poker hands. Each player and the dealer is dealt seven cards. From those seven cards you form two poker hands, one with two cards, the other with the remaining five cards. The only catch is that the five card hand must be higher than the two card hand. To win, both of your hands must beat the dealer's respective hands. Naturally this leads to lots of ties or pushes and of course no money exchanges. I'd give you an example of a hand, but I can tell that this is getting boring already. Just trust me, there are a lot of pushes, which in turn leads to you and your buddies sitting at the table for hours upon hours. If you get the cocktail waitress trained early, you won't be seeing straight by night's end. (Training the cocktail waitress: Step 1: Tip big on the first drink or two, after that she'll be back early and often. Step 2: Tip $1 everytime after that.)

After the Thursday night football game, Addy and I hit the Pai Gow table. The first night is a great example of how you win at Pai Gow, even when you lose. Addy had never played before, but that didn't stop him, nor should it stop any of you out there. One of the great staples of Pai Gow is that you can ask the dealer how the house would play your hand and they will tell you, EVERY TIME. This is good for Addy since he has the attention span of a 7 year old, especially when he starts drinking Redbull vodkas. It's really not that complicated though.

By the time 4 o'clock came around, we had the waitress bringing us RBVs every seven minutes. Addy, despite not paying attention and still having no idea what the rules were, had piled up a nice stack of chips. He also had made good friends with our good dealer Donna and the other patrons at the table. He had asked Donna to marry him a few times and the guys next to us kept gawking at him while he managed to keep stacking up chips. Like I said before, with all the pushed hands, it's rare that you lose much money, but in turn it's also rare that you win very much either. Chalk Addy's success up to drunken beginner's luck.

I said Donna was our good dealer. The bad dealer on this night was Chom. She was unbeatable and soon cleaned me out and took Addy's stack down considerably. Then Rainy came in (yes that is her name, 99% of the Pai Gow dealers are Asian, go figure) and really bent us over. Normally I have a rule that states if one is winning with a certain dealer, when he/she goes on break, color up and get the hell out of there because 99 times out of 100 the new dealer will absolutely anal rape you (figuratively speaking of course) and leave you feeling used and violated. I wasn't following my own rule on this night. I'll blame it on the waitress. She played hard.

When 5:30 came we decided it was time to call it and stumbled over for some food at the Earl of Sandwich. (sidebar: We had eaten before at some mexican bar. We pulled up and asked the bartender what he recommended on the menu. He highly recommended the menu item Drunken Nachos, $10. Seems really appealing and extremely appropriate right? Wrong. I remember the excitement I had for a huge plate of nachos with all the fixings and tons of chicken canvasing the delicious chips and cheese. When the bartender brought us our mini sized plates with seven chips topped with only a few shreds of cheese, I about threw my plate across the bar. What a let down. This little encounter left us thinking that we might never get a regularly sized meal in Vegas unless we either A) spent $20 or B) went to In-N-Out. Needless to say, we weren't looking forward to our food expenditures for the rest of the trip. This info is needed to understand the elation we experienced in the next part of our adventure. End sidebar) Little did we know, we would be eating the greatest sandwiches of our lifetimes. We decided to take the food back to the room, but when I turned around after nearing the elevators, I saw Addy standing in the middle of the casino floor, absolutely dominating his late dinner/early breakfast. I couldn't really blame him, as I would soon find out those were the greatest sandwiches ever made.

Despite the casino being a maze, we made it back to the room after only walking in a circle for 20 minutes. I'm not joking about the maze either. When Addy left the table to go to the bathroom, it was a forgone conclusion he would get lost on his way back, despite the bathroom being a 30 second walk in any direction. He'd be gone for 15 minutes at a time, which meant I would have to finish his drink so he could get a fresh one (bonus!). End of night one. Gambling tally: Dusty = down, Addy = up.

I wrote the above paragraphs in December, right after this trip. I had some elaborate plan to hold the readers in suspense with how I ended the first paragraph, but now I can hardly remember the details of everything that happened for the rest of the weekend. I'll give it my best shot in a short summary below (considering I always give too much detail about everything that 100% of the people reading don't care about). What can I say? I've been busy.

Like the first paragraph alluded, something was avoided that would have been a weekend stopper. I woke up and couldn't find my wallet. Wasn't in my pants pocket or on the desk or really anywhere after we tore the room apart. The big problem with that, aside from not having my plastic and paper money, was that I was flying out on Monday....and what do you need to fly? That's correct, a valid form of ID. I no longer had that and I had to be in Wichita for work starting Tuesday morning. What does one do in that situation? Bend over and try to relax? I didn't want to think about that, so we put our effort into finding the wallet, no matter how unlikely finding it seemed.

After we retraced all our steps and realized I used it at the sandwhich place around 6 AM, we figured I left it there or it had to be in the room. We again tore the room apart and not until I lifted up Addy's bed did he crawl under and come back out with my wallet. It was way up by the head of the bed near the corner (so basically the darkest place in the room). We had both looked under the bed multiple times and couldn't see it. I don't even know why I decided to lift the beds up, we both KNEW there wasn't anything under there. Oopsy daisy. Addy and I then participated in a 5 minute celebration around the room. There was dancing, high fiving, awkward hugging while jumping up and down in circles. Thankfully neither of us broke our leg like Kendrys Morales. Complete and utter jubilation was upon us, and it carried us through the rest of the weekend. One of us would say, "Hey remember when we found the wallet? That was one of the best moments EVER!" and the same 5 minute celebration would occur. True story.

After that little mini-debacle I left my extra DL (yes I have two, don't ask) and a credit card in the room, so even if disaster did strike, I would be ok. I will also be doing this anytime I travel by air for the rest of my life. You should too. That's Life Lesson #1 from me, more to follow. Remember when I wrote that this part would be short? The rest of the trip was great, more of the same as day one, except we went to 2 concerts (SSWY came with the first night), managed to get free tickets the 2nd night (how? some dude literally gave them to Addy and told us to buy him a beer inside) AND then sold our original night two tickets within 30 seconds. Sunday was also good as we gambled on nearly every NFL game and watched all of them (except the Vikings because the Metrodome roof collapsed...awesome!)

Sunday night ended back at the Pai Gow table. Addy and I both proceeded to bank some cash at the table. We give all the credit to our good luck chip. There was one chip in play that was different from the rest because it had a picture of some dude on it. Addy dubbed the chip 'The Wrestler' and claimed that he could never lose a hand with The Wrestler in play. Soon everyone at the table knew of The Wrestler and its powers. It was so powerful that it would draw cheers everytime Addy won a hand. He was guaranteeing the dealer would lose and daring the dealer to try and take it from him. The Wrestler even radiated good luck to the whole table (or at least me). We walked away with around $300 between the two of us, including The Wrestler. It may not sound like it on paper, but just take my word for it, The Wrestler was awesome and helped bring fun and camaraderie to the table.

Oh oh I just remembered another sweet move I pulled. Some Pai Gow tables have this 'Fortune Bonus' side bet, which if you play, you get paid out some decent odds when anyone at the table gets a straight or higher. One hand I had a straight flush on my high hand, and there was a dude playing the Fortune Bonus. I was waiting for him to get paid out, but the dealer took the cards and put them in the shuffle compartment. I asked the dealer why he didn't get paid because I had a straight flush, so the pit boss had to come over and pull the cards out of the shuffler and find my cards, then pay the guy out. The guy then proceeded to give me a $25 chip, considering I had just won him a couple hundy, I thought that was mighty fine of him. Boom, LAWYERED.

Overall in roughly 90 hours in Vegas we were inside the PH for 88 of them. The only exception was when we walked (which I don't recommend, it's tougher than you think to get across the interstate) to In-N-Out for some delicious double-doubles. The only other meals we had were from the Earl of Sandwhich and the bar where we went to watch football (still inside PH). After the first night, EoS became standard lunch, dinner, and breakfast, in that order because we were going to bed at 5 and waking up at noon. Those sandies were that good (and inexpensive!). Good times; and that's all I have to say about that.

What a long strange trip it's been

Well a lot has happened since my last post. I don't know where to begin. I think I'll try to sum up how I feel about certain events in a couple sentences. That's something new. Now I just need to think of the topics. Here we go.

DMB show Omaha

Highlight: Aside from the show itself (which was fantastic), seeing the chick next to us pass out right before our very eyes, falling absolutely face first on to the concrete floor harder than I've ever seen. Too mean? How about this, on the drive home Meow and I stopped at a gas station for some refreshments. For some reason, he purchased milk and was drinking it with the window down. A car that pulled up next to us said something funny about milk, but I can't remember what it was. Now I bet you wish I would've have just stopped with the girl falling on her face. Too late.

Lowlight: As I was standing on the corner waiting to cross the street on the way to the Qwest Center, a bird shat on my right shoulder. True story.

DMB show St. Paul

Highlight: Aside for the show itself (which was fantastic), it had to be the antics of Dr. P A) telling Joe Nathan (whom we saw at the bar after the show) that he would never come back from surgery and be good again, B) getting kicked out of bar 1 for slamming a fake window at a booth, C) nearly getting kicked out of bar 2 for breaking a pint glass at the table and knocking a neon sign off the window, and D) asking for a ride from Addy and I only to disappear and take what had to be a $50 cab ride home. Bravo Dr. P!

Lowlight: Wait, maybe the highlight was actually the lowlight. So here's the actual highlight - taking my sister, brother, and his girlfriend to their first shows! (awwwwwwww how sweet am I?)

Twins @ White Sox, US Cellular Field, Chicago, IL, USA, Earth, Milky Way, The Universe

Greatest Mauer jersey ever?

Highlight: Aside from the game itself (which was fantasic), I'd say it would have to be us trying to bring brooms in as the Twins were looking to complete a 3 game sweep, the security gaurds telling us we couldn't bring in the full brooms, us breaking them off right near the sweeper part so we could get in with the brooms, me busting out my broom in the 1st inning after the Twins were up 1-0, my friends quickly grabing it from me telling me it was too early for that, the Twins scoring 2 more runs that inning making my friends look silly for stopping me, all of the shit we took from the Sox fans around us as the Twins held on for the sweep, and all of the random Twins fans that wanted to take pictures with us because of our sweet broom handles. Oh yeah, not getting shot after all those shenanigans while on the south side of Chi-town was pretty cool too.

Tailgating with brooms a-ready.

Lowlight: Addy making a fool of himself, leaning over the bullpen, screaming at Matt Thornton and asking him which milestone he was going to give up next (referring to Jim Thome's moonshot in extra innings at Target Field on 8/17), before nearly getting escorted out by security. Don't mess with karma dude.

DMB Wrigley Day 1

Highlight: Aside from the show itself (which was fantastic), keeping up Chicago traditions by going for a slurpee at 7-Eleven. There's one on every corner. Kind of like Dunkin Donuts on the east coast. Don't think that the day sucked just because a slurpee is my highlight either. You don't know how much I love slurpees and as a bonus, we got some taquitos. Also we managed to get a free beer tower after the show and I of course showcased my best dance moves.

Lowlight: Dr. P bought a metal slurpee straw. Yes, he paid money for a straw that had the words 'Slurpee' printed on it. Also, my old reliable Moto Q died on me. Good night, sweet Prince.

It's funny if you read it as one sentence.

DMB Wrigley Day 2

Highlight: Aside from the show itself (which was fantastic), watching the Big Red throttle Washington at a local Husker bar. The place was almost as full of Husker fans as the sea of red at Memorial Stadium. Pretty nifty atmosphere considering we were 525 miles removed from Lincoln. Playing on my new phone provided some entertainment as well.

Look at the bun on that! Kirkwood Bar, Chicago.

Lowlight: Bom Bom and I falling asleep, beers in hand, at the bar near home base. Both teams played hard. In our defense we were sitting on an extremely comfortable couch.

P & L District, KC, MO

Highlight: Aside from the cab ride through Taco Bell drive thru (which was fantastic), I'd say the piano bar was a good time but not for any particular reason (probably because I don't remember any particular moments), but the real good time was back at the hotel when the DeanYo told me he'd buy my KC Chiefs ticket if I went over and knocked on the door of the previously discovered bachelorette party room, in nothing but my boxers. Of course I did and it was caught on video.... For mature audiences only. (plays with quick time)

Lowlight: I can’t really think of one, so we must have been flying high all night. That almost makes me wish we had a Dr. P type there to make a good story. Almost. (Just kidding Dr. P! Or am I?)

Team Digits @ Chiefs, Arrowhead Stadium

Highlight: Aside from the game itself (which was fantastic), definitely had to be all of the supremely clever Chiefs fans that told me I was in the wrong place since I was wearing a Vikings jersey. Can’t a person just go to a game and be a football fan supporting his team? I countered by telling them I was part of an NFL sponsored program called Fans Across America, of which the goal is to have at least one fan from every NFL team at every game for the entire season.

Post game highlight: I met Jum and some friends at the casino in KC and watched football at the bar. We nearly saw two Chiefs fans square off because one was rooting for the Chargers instead of the Seahawks. Fortunately, only the wife was knocked on the ground when the guy went over to scream at the other guy, ‘I was born!’ That must be out of context because it doesn’t make sense. Does it?

Probably the only time Team Digits was in the red zone all day.

Lowlight: Due to the previous night’s activities in the P & L District, it was a slow moving day and there wasn’t much motivation to get crazy. Plus it may have taken an IV of moonshine to get me feeling anywhere near sloppy faced. Probably a good thing since it was Sunday, I still had a 3 hour drive home, and work was at 7:30 AM and I was still planning on going to the casino with Jum until 10 PM.

Special thanks to all of you wonderful people out there that made these events possible, especially to our lovely lady Chi-town hosts, even if one of you is a White Sox fan.

You can only be a Sox fan if you are from south Chicago. Lucky for Tags, she is.

Bom and I enjoying a Twins sweep.

I am kind of in a shell shock after the recent happenings involving my favorite baseball and football teams, especially after two great seasons and the high expectations going in to this baseball post-season and this early football season. The sweep of the Twins feels different this year. I can’t put my finger on it, but this one is going to be tougher to get over. Trying to write about it isn’t helping so I’ll move on to the debacle that is the 1-3 Minnesota Vikings.

It is hard to imagine that Sidney Rice was such a big piece of our offense that we can’t even function without him. Clearly other factors are in play here i.e., horrible play calling, poor efforts in picking up blitzes, and an overall lack of enthusiasm. It is also weird that I posted a picture of Randy Moss in my NFL preview post and now he has returned to Minny. Encouraging, even in the loss to the Jets, were the flashes I saw of the ’09 offense possibly waking up and coming to life. Discouraging, however, was the late pick the newly crowned all-time fumbles leader threw to end the game. Despite the disappointments, I’ll continue to lay it all out there for my teams. In winning or losing seasons, through good press and junk picture texting scandals, through sweeps of the White Sox and division series sweeps by the Yanks, I’ll be there. Like my friend Ben Wrightman said, ‘It’s good for your soul to invest in something you can’t control.’

Call Me Crazy....

Last night was the start of a five day stretch of what may seem crazy to some, but will most likely rival some of my greatest adventures I've experienced in my lifetime. I may sound like a broken record here talking about my favorite band, but I don't care. They [Dave Matthews Band] were in my town last night so of course I had to attend. Back when I lived in the Great White North, the other groupies and I routinely drove countless hours to see a show. So when the baddest band in the land is playing 20 minutes away from where I lay my head at night, I'd be a hypocrite if I didn't go. Not that I didn't want to go, but in lieu of the events planned during the next four days, I was hesitant at dropping cash on a ticket. Let me explain.

Back in March, I purchased DMB tickets to the St. Paul show as a graduation/birthday gift for my little sister. Even though he's a bum and he doesn't read this fantastic publication, I bought a ticket for my brother as a birthday gift. If I was really cool, I would have bought a ticket for his girlfriend without expecting her to pay me back, but my generosity only goes so far. Maybe I'll buy her a mixed drink before the show. Sorry, I'm getting sidetracked; the point is, we planned on going to this show and it would be a good time blah, blah, blah. That was as far as this story went. The Execl Energy Center show was scheduled as the last stop on the 2010 summer tour. The key word in that last sentence is 'was.' It 'was' the last show of the summer tour until a couple months ago when they added two shows at Wrigley Field. Combo the addition of the Wrigley shows with the band's announcement that there would not be a 2011 tour and the groupies and I decided we had to be in attendance. Shortly after they went on sale, we had a crew of six going to both nights in Chicago. Boom.

As I said before, last night was the Omaha show. I'm leaving in an hour for St. Paul. Tomorrow, Meow is meeting Addy and I in Des Moines and we'll be in Chi-town by 5 PM. Now it's time for you to get out your MLB schedules and see who just happens to be in town playing the rival White Sox. Oh what's that? My defending Central Division Champion Minnesota Twins are wrapping up a three game series versus the south-siders? Well it would just be stupid not to go to that game decked out in Twins gear, obnoxiously drunk, screaming long-time White Sox television broadcaster Ken 'Hawk' Harrelson sayings. I think the game is going to be broadcast on MLB Network so if you don't live in Twins or Sox territory, look for us on the TV.

The Twins magic number is currently at 12 so we can't clinch the division while we are in attendance, but you could imagine what it'd be like if we could. Right? Right? Right? Funny story: I just told the short version of this post to my buddy El DeanYo. This is his response: Wow.. you are doing more this weekend then I've done my entire life. You should write a song about it. Or blog.'