Rooftop Jams '03: A Mixtape Of All The Queen Songs I Was Really In To In The Summer Of 2003

What a place that New York City is. Those streets made me feel brand new. Those lights did inspire me. Despite the fact that I got in 12 hours later than I was supposed to (thanks Midwest Airlines!), I managed to get over my continuing airline travel curse and have a super swell time. Most of the time it feels good hangin’ with the laid back country folk, but every once in awhile, I like to mix it up and feel the hustle and bustle of the big city. All teams played hard and majorly contributed to what I’m calling a tremendous victory, not only for us travelers, but for the city of New York and all of the people there that were blessed enough to have been touched by our "presence." Why did I put presence in quotes? The answer is because Paul Rudd is my hero. If you are lost right now, go out and rent Role Models and watch it. Hurry up or you’re going to miss more references. Anyway, back to the people that were touched, even though you didn’t say thank you, we know you are grateful. You are welcome.

Look at Ant's Nose Neighbor. It was a conversation piece. Sample dialogue: Have you seen my friend with the mustache?

The trip provided much entertainment from top to bottom, but there are a few things that stick out and might be worth sharing. Obviously, I must think my life is fantastically entertaining or I wouldn’t keep an entire blog dedicated to, as my boy SSWY put it, spinning epic tales of grand adventure. Some people may think they aren't worth sharing. Maybe you don't want to read. That's the beauty of free will, you control what you do. Sometimes I want to be from Vermont and have an emerging maple syrup conglomerate and, at least in my own mind, that can be true. The point is, you can read this or close the window, the choice is yours. Do you think I care if anyone reads this? Ok, you got me, I really, really do. What can I say? I have low self esteem. Can you tell that I didn’t get a lot of sleep last night? I’ve been listening to Come on Elieen by Kevin Rowland and Dexy’s Midnight Runners on repeat for the entire work day; that should give you some kind of indication of the shape I’m in. At four and half minutes per play, I’d say that today I’ve heard it roughly 87 times and counting. With that, I’ll segue in to spinning some epic mini-tales of grand adventure.

Addy, DC, Ant, and I after Friday's show

I previously mentioned that I was most excited about makin’ sweet plays on the Great Lawn. We did put on a quite a clinic for those watching. Hitting the cut-off man, gunning down imaginary runners, and throwing wicked breaking pitches were all activities that made the Makin' Plays: The Great Lawn Story documentary. We couldn’t really make as many plays as we wanted due to time constraints, temperature constraints, and old washed up arm constraints, but we made the best of what’s around.

Couldn't have been too hot. I kept the sweater vest on

The Jimmy Fallon taping was cool to see live. The highlight of the show, aside from JLoveH talking about happy endings and us repping our favorite ballclub on national TV, was Addy and Ant getting their cameras confiscated for breaking the ‘no pictures in the studio’ rule. While Addy thought he could be pretty sneaky (or snakey) and snap a pic ninja style during the JLH interview, he was sadly mistaken. As soon as he took the pic and thought he was in the clear, I assured him that one of the thirty-seven security guys scanning the crowd with hawk-like prowess saw him. Sure enough, during the next break the iPhone was confiscated. Ant was a little less discrete when he attempted his photo. The show was over and people were leaving when an announcement reminded us to keep cell phones put away until we exited the studio. Ant thought that meant he could take out his actual camera and take a picture; this was not a correct assumption. When the security guys yelled out, ‘Swarm!!’ Ant just held the camera out so they could take it from him. They didn’t take it since the show was over, but they did stand there and watch as Addy and Ant deleted the pictures from their respective electronics.

Of course he's in a 3-point stance

The concerts were great, as always. Zac Brown opened both nights and surprised us with a little Rage Against the Machine cover. I think they could switch musical genres without skipping a beat. That boy has some anger he needs to let out and the crowd was going nuts, especially considering the headliner wasn’t going to be on stage for another hour. The baddest band in the land delivered some quality music and we all sweated through our clothes multiple times. Our crew was pretty close the 2nd night.

Dave and the boys doin' their thing

One of the random things we ended up doing was attending a comedy show at a supposed famous place where the likes of Murphy, Seinfeld, Rock, and Sandler used to play. We weren’t expecting much and only bought the tickets because A) they were $10 and B) there was a chance the dude that wears a trucker hat from 30 Rock would show up for a set. I just remembered, the bar across the street from the club happened to have $1 beers all night. That may have slightly influenced our decision. Random decision number one of the trip turned out to be a good one. We saw several good acts and one fantastic set by a finalist on Last Comic Standing, and our boy from 30 Rock showed up. The only bad thing (which makes it a better story) is that there was a two drink minimum and the prices were like that of a strip club (or Yankee game). Beer was the cheap item on the menu at $10 each; mixed drinks were going for $15. Long story short, Ant was double fisting, yadda yadda yadda, he was mildly upset when his bill arrived.

You could get a whole bunch of Mums

I'll wrap this up with a particularly strange event that happened during our grand adventures. One night after the show, we got back to the hotel around 12:30 to change and head back out, taking advantage of the 4 AM bar close time. When in Rome, right? We end up at some dive bar right around the corner. Ant strikes up a convo with a random kid, meanwhile I'm running out of gas at an incredible rate. Next thing I know, bar had closed, we all had 6-packs, and were sitting on the rooftop of the random kid's apartment listening to every song in Queen's catalog, while watching the sunrise. Also, the random kid was absolutely rocking out, by himself, to every single song. He was just off in his own little world strutting around the roof, while three strangers watched, dancing his face off to his iPod, from which he was exclusively playing Queen, for about two solid hours. Yes, he was extremely high and entertainment was had by all.

In case you can't read the fine print:

-That's definitely a dude

-It can't be

-It's not

-Who cares?

Big Citi Living

These next few days have the potential to be great. In a few hours I'm leavin' on a jet plane and, unlike LeBron James, I'm taking my talents to New York. On the agenda for this trip: 2 dmb shows at Citi Field, 1 baseball game at Yankee Stadium, 1 taping of Late Night with Jimmy Fallon at 30 Rock, and the making of an educational documentary film called Makin' Plays: The Great Lawn Story on Central Park's Great Lawn. I am not sure which event I'm more excited for. The same trio of characters as the 2009 Boston 4th of July extravaganza are partaking, with a special guest appearance by DC. We proved three wasn't a crowd last year. It was actually a freakin' blast of epic proportions. Adding one more to our crew can only help the situation, right? Of course. All you need is a great attitude and unlimited enthusiasm. I'm an idea man and I thrive on enthusiasm.

Remember when I said I wasn't sure about which event I was more excited for? I lied. Concerts and ballgames are fun and all, but I'm really pumped to be out on the Great Lawn makin' some sick plays. Flashing the leather on the Great Lawn is one of the best activities anyone could ever participate in. I've got my ball glove ready and there'll definitely be shades of JT Snow out there on the Great Lawn. I've also decided that I like saying/typing the words Great Lawn. I'm not sure why we even booked a hotel room. I'd be happy to camp out under the stars on the Great Lawn. The park can't be as scary as it is portrayed in Home Alone 2. That bird lady still gives me nightmares. I don't care if she ended up making friends with Kevin McCallister. She made Harry and Marv look like something right out of Disney.

Isn't it breath-taking?

Ant landed there this morning and has already sent me a Time's Square pic. Addy was supposed to be there with him this morning, taking the red-eye from PHX to ATL to JFK last night, which brings me to a little story about karma. Addy is notorious for cutting it close when traveling by air. He usually arrives 7 minutes prior to departure and somehow checks in, gets through security, and gets in a front row seat in 6.5 minutes. Also, his flights are never delayed for any reason, even this past Christmas his plane somehow landed in Bemidji during a blizzard white-out hell storm, while two years ago, my plane circled Bemidji with clear skies and flew back to MSP. After his most recent demonstration of this behavior, I expressed my concern for how long his good luck with air travel would last. Here are some texts I received from him today.

12:25 AM: Damn. Just missed my HOTlanta flight

12:41 AM: Actually my 80 min Phx delay did all the work for me

12:46 AM: Any chance to catch my ATL flight when I land 15 minutes after it takes off?

12:47 AM: Could make up some serious time on a 5 hour flight, right?

12:50 AM: My iPhone flight update app had it delayed hours ago. Delta.com still doesn't know.

1:57 AM: They're sending me home (in a cab I'm paying for). And coming back tomorrow. See you at 3 pm big apple. @#!* this.

1:51 PM: Wheels down in the city that only sleeps on Sundays!

See how quickly he got his enthusiasm back? That's why we need the Big Guy there. See you soon fellas!

Star Island: Sandy Beaches Where Dreams Are Made Of

Last weekend was the one year anniversary of the best weekend of my life (day 1, day 2, days 3-4). Although I knew this weekend would be a great one, it's difficult to avoid comparing all my future weekends to last year's Boston Excursion, which surpassed any possible expectations and was truly magical in nature. That being said, it's also hard to have a bad time on the 4th of July. Especially if you know of a little place called Assssssssspin, where the beer flows like wine and the women flock like the salmon of Capistrano. Wait... I mean if you know a little place called Star Island on the great Cass Lake. Myself, along with a few of my cohorts made the trip to 'sota for an old fashioned good time.

My boy Addy, was flying in to our old college town of Grand Forks on Friday and hitching a ride with SSWY, his lovely wife, and their two dogs. From the outside that looks like nice little family and friends trip. The two dogs in this nice little family and friends trip happen to be English Bulldogs. Duke and Dora used to look like this, but now they look more like this. Ok, maybe I'm exaggerating a tad. I'm just saying, they are bigger than they used to be, and Addy might have been a little cramped riding bitch with these two pups lounging in the backseat with him. I was driving up from OmaHuh on Friday and, being the adventurous type that I am, decided that I would go up slightly out of my way to GF to meet my friends, see the old town, eat some greatly missed cuisine, and convoy back to B-town with the crew. So instead of heading east at Fargo, I continued north with visions of grinders and cheese tostadas dancing in my head.

The dogs used to fit in the sink. Not so much anymore. Is there anyone sitting on that chair? I can't tell.

Once I arrived, I only had to fulfill a couple of SSWY's husband duties as he was working (run errands with the wife and take the dogs for a walk) before I could enjoy the simple greatness that is the Red Pepper. Unfortunately, we had to pick-up Addy at the airport before I could take full advantage of my fill-in husband duties (ho ho just kidding Lindsey!). As we said goodbye to the married kids, who were in a bigger hurry to get back home than us two swingin' bachelors, we pondered where this night was heading. After some quick BWWs, we headed to a favorite watering hole called Judy's to meet an acquaintance from Addy's schooling years. Soon, hours had passed by in what seemed like minutes, as we talked and laughed the night away with funny stories, past and present. All good things must come to an end, so we said our goodbyes and headed over to the Red Pepper. Yes, again. Addy hadn't even been there yet and I wasn't going to deny him of some delicious grinder goodness because I had previously eaten there six hours prior! Plus it was after midnight, so it wasn't like I had it twice in one day or anything (As if that even matters? Why do I feel like people are judging me like I broke some kind of law?). I like to eat turkey grinders with taco meat, doused in red and white sauce. Deal with it.

We made a safe journey home where I dropped Addy at his folks' place before returning to my folks' place. What a nice surprise I had waiting for me upon my arrival home. The bed I normally sleep in was occupied. So, there I was left with a pull-out, but not just any ordinary pull-out. It is a single pull-out, probably the only one ever made due to it's ridiculously small size. A seven year old kid might fit on this thing, maybe if he didn't have legs. By the time I actually tried to go to sleep, it was 5 AM and the sun was coming up on a beautiful Saturday morning.

The next day was a nice little Saturday even without a Home Depot visit. I'd say the highlights were spending some time on the lake, meeting some friends out, and dominating some pizza from Dave's. The pizza was by far the best part of the day. I'm saying that despite the hours I spent flying across Lake Bemidji on a jet-ski. Flying. The wind was really tossing my watercraft around out there. I'm just giving you an idea of how good the pizza is. If it can beat the greatest water sport activity ever invented, it's gotta be goooooood.

On America's birthday, I began the day eating a wonderfully prepared meal of brats, corn, beans, snicker salad, cheesy potatoes, and beer; not a bad way to start off the greatest day in American history. Addy and I were ready for Dad to take us out to Star Island. (Background story: Dad, in this scenario, is neither Addy's nor my dad. Dad is a friend of ours that acts a lot like our dads. He takes us fishing and hunting, drives us around if we've been drinking, plays darts with us, and takes us to Star Island. In lieu of this, we call him Dad and he calls both of us his sons.) Just like a good Dad always comes through, so did our Dad on this glorious day of American pride.

Many people from the Great White North know of the island that is called Star. I am proud to say I am one of them, and I frequent the beautiful place any chance I can. For those of you who don't know, let me paint a word picture. Imagine, for a second, a sandy beach tucked in a cove on an island. Imagine walking in knee to waist deep water, feeling nothing but sand between your toes, as the waves gently crash upon the shore. Imagine 100+ boats pulling up to the shoreline and anchoring for a day of sun soaking and partying with friends and strangers alike, as time crawls slowly by, hour after fun-filled hour. Imagine jet-skis, water-skis, beach games, music, and best of all - young girls in bikinis, stretching as far as down as the shore will allow. Imagine a place where smiles are infinite and dreams become reality. That is the place we spent our 4th of July, and it was simply amazing. I can't quite put my finger on it, but there is something about being on the water that makes me realize how good life is and where my home truly is. I love that place.

What happens on Star Island, stays on Star Island. Except for swimmer's itch. That shit'll come back with you. -Addy D

Pizza Hut and Losing: A Sad Commentary

Remember when I said the party was just getting started at the CWS? That is called a blog tease. It's kind of like when a chick flirts with you long enough to get you to pay for something (dinner, drinks, etc.), while giving you a semi, before leaving you hanging with nothing to show for it. It's kind of like that, except much less exciting. I was planning on delivering on my tease because, A) I thought I had something to offer and B) I hate those chicks. I don't want to hate myself. I'll leave that to the emo kids. Anyway, after I thought about it, I realized that despite everyone in the entire town knowing we had an AWESOME time, there were only a few things that stood out in my mind from Sunday and Monday before Addy left.

We continued to stick it to the NCAA by way of bringing my 'binoculars' to the game. Although we sat right behind home plate, they were very useful in keeping the buzz of college baseball alive in the stadium. It kind of sounded like a world cup soccer match. That was probably just in my head.

I was encouraged by some middle-age lady folk to 'take it off!' as I walked by their tailgate. After I told them to be careful what they wish for, I joined their tailgate for the remainder of the night. Evidently I made a good impression, because somewhere in between listening to one lady's life story and drinking their beer, a dude took my picture and sent it to his sister-in-law telling me he would introduce us.

Later we saw Christopher Walken wandering through the lot. He came up to us and asked us if we wanted to go smoke a couple cigars out on the dock. To which we of course answered, 'Stogies? Why not?'

Ok, one of the above things didn't happen, but I'm not telling which. Addy later caught a ride to the airport from a girl he met one night in Omaha over a year ago when passing through. If you met a girl for one night, could you make enough of an impression on her so that, over one year later, she would give you a ride to the airport if you randomly showed up and asked her to? I think you need super powers to do that. Through deductive reasoning, I have determined that Addy is a superhero. My best friend is a superhero. I thought it would be cool to know a superhero, but once I realized he uses his powers to help himself only, instead of others, I got over it.

Thank goodness I got that out of the way so I can bring up the main topic of this post. Has anyone seen that fairly new Pizza Hut commercial that has been airing for the last few weeks? It has two little leaguers talking about how losing isn't bad because their coach takes them to Pizza Hut afterwards. Don't try and tell me it's supposed to be light-hearted and funny. Make a joke about something that doesn't give losing a thumbs up. What kind of message are we sending to America's youth with this crap? What kind of people work for Pizza Hut advertising? How did they get their jobs? I bet it wasn't with that attitude.

'Oh darn! They didn't go for our ad pitch and now we are homeless and jobless. Don't worry, once I have a slice of pepperoni lovers, it won't matter anymore! Who cares if we lost the job!? Someone will take care of us, even if we can't do it ourselves. Someone will pay for my gas and my mortgage, it'll be like Christmas!'

Sorry I blew up. Maybe I'm overreacting (although highly unlikely). I need one of my three readers to weigh in on this and tell me I'm not crazy.*

*Hint - That means if you think I am crazy, keep your opinion to yourself.

I Love My Frogs!

The College World Series has been going on since last Saturday and what a glorious few days it has been. This may be the best time of year in Omaha, and I was lucky enough to be able to share it with some of my closest friends. Addy, SSWY, and Jum all made the trek from their respective regions of the country to celebrate NCAA Baseball's best student athletes and the last CWS at Omaha's Rosenblatt Stadium. Remember, the NCAA clearly is about academics first and foremost. Then, if there's time, they try and squeeze in some athletics.

Jum and I had some CWS experience, but Addy and SSWY were rookies and anxious to get their feet wet. So anxious in fact was SSWY, he couldn't sleep Friday night. That may have been because he had to work late and then drive to Omaha so he could join us at our tailgate at 8 AM. Fantastic effort SSWY. Give him a round of applause. Saturday was a good day and a lot of stuff happened. One thing that didn't happen, was us getting kicked out or even slightly bothered by the tailgate security/police. Despite the new security measures that were implemented for the last CWS at Rosenblatt, we were able to stick it to the NCAA for about 12 straight hours on Saturday. While SSWY and Jum had to return home on Sunday, Addy and I stuck around to do it all over again on Monday, before his flight home. Come to think of it, we didn't do too bad of a job on Sunday either, but that's for another time.

As we are entering the tailgate lot with 1,000,000 other cars, we blasted some vuvezelas from Addy's iPhone app and we bumped Supwitchugirl's 'I Love My Ducks' with some slight lyrical changes. Instead of 'I smell roses,' we belted out 'I smell Rosenblatt.' Instead of 'I love my Ducks,' we rocked 'I love Horned Frogs.' That was the team's bandwagon we decided to jump on. We jumped on it all the way.

Soon after we parked, we became friends with the 10 middle aged ladies directly next to us. Soon after that, a catchphrase for the day was born. As SSWY pulled of his hat in a quick like motion, his sunglasses flew off, and one of the ear pieces detached from the rest of the frame. Before you could say 'I love Horned Frogs!' one of the ladies was at SSWY's side fixing it. When she handed the glasses back to him she said, 'Easy Trigger,' which triggered raucous laughter from the rest of us (pun intended).

Of course it wasn't enough to just tell people we were TCU fans, we had to show people. We accomplished that by purchasing four Horned Frog hats. The die-hard fans/vets of CWS (Jum and I) also were sporting some fantastically purple shirts.

I was getting made fun of for my stylish faded tank. Naturally, I told the boys that I was ripping the sleeves off my brand new TCU shirt before I got out of the store. Don't hate my arms because they love the sun.

Now we had our tailgate spot held down and we had our team gear; there was only one thing left to do, sit down and take it all in. There were good tunes, good company, good weather, and most importantly, good beverages flowing for most the rest of the day. Addy and SSWY got some free tix to go and check out the inside of Rosenblatt, which was something that wasn't actually planned as a Saturday activity, so that was nice. Good for the rooks. By the way, the view is breathtaking; I'm surprised they even game back to the tailgate.

We were making some bloodies throughout the day, so this line from a Bloomington Bros. video (about 20 sec mark) started being repeated quite a bit, 'Wait a second....... a little BM?' Later on, Addy and I began a great rendition of Go Cubs Go at the top of our lungs because the guy next to us was leaving, and he just so happened to have a cubs shirt on. Makes sense right? We ended up closing down Pauli's (a big CWS bar), dodging a major bullet (thanks Karma), and crushing some Taco Bell (2nd night in a row). I can't say enough about the solid performance from 8 AM to 2 AM, all the way around. Bravo boys and girls. It's too bad we lost two boys on Sunday, because the party was just getting started....

Lookin' good fellas. Thanks for bringin' the 'A' game.

Meow, T Fell, The K, and me.

A few weekends ago, my favorite baseball team was playing a weekend series against the Kansas City Royals down at The K. Now, The K is no Target Field, but it is a beautiful ballyard and I enjoy watching games there for a few reasons. A) The Royals haven't exactly enjoyed what one would call success for a few years now, thus leaving the stands fairly empty, allowing us to buy the cheapest tickets available and sit basically wherever we please, B) It is quite a nice park and the setting of my first outdoor MLB game after countless games in the now former Twins 'ballpark' (I use the term ballpark very loosely), and C) Chili Cheese Fries (thanks Jum Hammonds).

The boys (Meow and T Fell) and I made the trip down on a Saturday morning for a 6:10 start. The forecast originally had rain scheduled but had changed during the week to a beautiful, sunny and 70 forecast. Naturally when we hit the MO border, the rain started falling. Fortunately we didn't care if it rained on our parade. If anything, it made us more determined to have a good time. We did just that.

Beginning of the K-C sucks chant

It happened to be Zack Greinke bobblehead day (BONUS!) and despite us entering the park five minutes before first pitch, all three of us got a souvenir. Way to support your staff Ace, Royals fans! As you may be able to tell from the video and that great pic of me on the cooler, we were feeling no pain as the game started. That all changed very quickly for Meow. I'm going to say it was in the middle of the 2nd inning when we saw and heard some fireworks, but it wasn't from a player hitting a home run. These particular fireworks were in the stands, in our row and aisle. Some of the fireworks even hit me! Meow decided to listen to the roar of the crowd from our tailgate spot for the remainder of the game, which went 12 innings in a Twins victory. All in all, a great success. I may have even caught a little shut-eye between pitches.

It's amazing that he saw less than 2 innings of ball. Looks like a champ in this pic.

Moral of the story: Drink Keystone Ice in moderation

A Dream So Real

I had a dream a short time ago and I figured it was worth mentioning in this well read publication. It was the best dream I’ve ever had in my life, and I know what you’re thinking so get your mind out of the gutter. You know how sometimes you have dreams that seem so real, but when you try and tell someone about it, the details escape you? This dream was nothing like that. I still remember every moment as if it really happened.

It was early morning, I had just woken up from a glorious slumber, and I found myself feeling excited. I found myself so excited I could hardly sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it was the excitement only a baseball fan can feel. Why was I excited? Maybe it was because it was a Monday and I wasn’t going to work. Maybe it was because I wasn’t waking up alone on this particular morning (Addy was sharing the bed). Maybe it was because I was extremely psyched for the Diet Mtn Dew breakfast I was about to have. All those things probably played a minor part in my excitement, but the real reason was something that I’d been counting down to since August 30, 2007. After 957 days, the time had finally arrived. Did I mention I was excited?

As the bus whisked my boy Addy and me away towards our destination, our smiles grew so wide that nothing, not even a little rain, could wipe them from our faces. We arrived at the greatest place in the world shortly after 8 AM. We were a liiiiiitle e-a-r-l-y for the day’s event, but we didn’t mind, there were plenty of activities to keep us busy for the next four hours.

As the time approached Addy and I decided to talk to the media about this joyous occasion. We did an interview with the local newspaper and even got some TV time. We did our best to take it all in from start to finish. There were multiple videos shot and hundreds of pictures taken even before the event began. Looking back, I only wish there would have been more time. Although there seemed to be plenty of time, it all flew by so quickly.

When the doors opened, the first of many climactic moments brought on a feeling of pure elation set in, and my passion bucket began to overflow. Addy and I were now joined by Ant, and as we walked around the glorious structure, it was a real dream like feeling. Now I know that this is already a dream I am describing, so yes, I am saying that in my dream it was so surreal, I was in a dream-like state. Ya dig? The sights, the sounds, the aromas I saw, heard, and smelled that day will forever be etched in my memory.

As the event wore on for another three hours or so, I kept waiting to wake up from this dream, but I never did. I'm still waiting to wake up. I'm not sure what I experienced was reality, and yet all signs are still indicating it was reality. A dream-like reality that I don't ever want to wake up from. I guess that means, I lived the dream. Chances to live your dreams don't come around but once in a lifetime. I took advantage of my chance, and if you have 13 and 1/2 minutes of your life to spare, let me share a little part of the dream I lived. Enjoy. (No you don't have to sign up for anything, just press play until it does, and close any pop-up windows because they are worthless)